August 24, 2011
"Men are made strong not by winning easy battles, but by losing hard-fought ones." Dick Bass
You gave it all that you had and you still came up short. The ball didn't bounce your way. The cookie crumbled in your lap. In spite of your best efforts, you didn't pass the test. You didn't get the raise or promotion. You lost the battle. And you feel lousy.
After all, you wanted to win. You wanted to succeed. You wanted to make the grade. But you failed. You fizzled. You flopped. And lost out. Now what?
You can either allow the losing to become the name of your game - or you can dust yourself off, pick yourself up, learn from your failure. And get back in the hunt.
While I will grant you that losing is never pleasant, losing is not the end of the world. Even the greatest that have ever lived tasted defeat a thousand times over. And so will you. No matter how hard you work, no matter how much you try to avoid defeat, losing happens. But so what?
It's not the losing which defines you. It's how you handle defeat that defines where you go from here.
"The minute you start talking about what you're going to do if you lose, you have lost." George Shultz
Too many people worry way too much about losing. In fact, these individuals are so wrapped up in the 'what if I lose' mindset that they unknowingly set the stage for failure. They don't mean to, they certainly don't want to, but they do so nonetheless. By focusing on what happens if they lose, they take their eyes off of the prize. And inadvertently pave their pathway to defeat.
Winners focus on winning; about giving their best, doing their best, being their best. They know they are going to get some bumps and bruises along the way. They realize they are going to get slammed every now and then. But rather than allowing the losing a chance to take over, they take a different track.
They view setbacks as temporary speed bumps, learning opportunities they can use to grow and get better. Success to them is about overcoming the obstacles they face. It's about persevering through the defeats they suffer. It's about chasing their dreams despite the obstacles they encounter. It's about coming out on top... no matter what.
These winners follow the words of famed tennis pro Arthur Ashe, who said, "You've got to get to the stage in life where going for it is more important than winning or losing." Quite simply, they are too busy winning to worry about losing.
"He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses much more, He who loses faith, loses all." Eleanor Roosevelt
The best way to keep moving forward is to stop moving backwards. Sounds easy, but few master it. Truth be told, most people keep making the same mistakes over and over again. And keep digging themselves a deeper hole. You need to make sure you don't.
Whenever you suffer a setback (which you will from time to time), you need to stop. Stop doing what isn't working. Stop repeating and re-repeating mistakes. Stop letting the losing get the best of you. And stop thinking negative thoughts.
After you have slammed on the brakes, stopping the negativity cold, you need to figure out what caused the problem. Focus on what you can do better. Focus on fixing what went wrong. Start moving in the right direction. And you'll start winning again.
By following this winning game plan, you will not only cut your losses before they have a chance to snowball, you will get back on the winning track.
"The more men have to lose, the less willing are they to venture." Thomas Paine
When you obsess about losing, losing becomes a way of life. You start losing your battles, losing your dreams and losing control of your life. However, when you focus your heart and soul on winning, you set the stage for an amazing comeback.
Now don't get me wrong, you are going to lose on occasion. You are going to get knocked on your heels. You are going to get bounced around. But by developing a winner's mindset, where you expect to win no matter what, you learn to handle problems as they crop up. You learn to maneuver around minefields. You learn how to stay on track. And learn how to win.
Winning is about preparing to win. It's about wanting to win. It's about expecting to win... even when you're down, when you're losing, when the losses are piling up.
Stay focused, stay committed, stay strong; stay determined to make your dreams come true. By never allowing a setback to become a road block, you will start cutting your losses. And start winning a lot.
Power Pointer: Never allow a speed bump to become a stumbling block.
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