January 1, 2009.
"The cyclone derives its powers from a calm center. So does a person."
Norman Vincent Peale
Ever have someone get you a little aggravated? Maybe even a little agitated, infuriated or exasperated? Sure you have, we all have from time to time. For whatever the reason, there's never a shortage of folks who grate on our nerves and get under our skin.
Have you ever had someone do you wrong? Or have someone make promises they failed to keep? Or have someone let you down and leave you holding the bag (an empty bag at that)? I'm sure the answers are yes, yes and yes.
Why are some individuals such a pain in the& neck? Who knows why, but some people are; it's just the way it goes. And we have to be able to deal with these people on occasion. When others become a tad annoying or even downright maddening, we have to make a choice. We can elect be just as annoying and irritating as they are.
Or we can choose to be better than that.
"He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still."
When people do you wrong, you can do them right back. When others sink to unthinkable lows, you can sink even lower. Sure, you can and yes, many times you may tempted to do precisely that. But for goodness sakes, are reckless responses really the way to go?
Will getting nasty make things one bit better? Do you actually believe that wading down into the muck and fighting it out is really the answer? Will really letting others have it get you anywhere close to where you want to go? Getting down and dirty is never the answer.
You have to be bigger than that.
"The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust."
While losing your temper or letting off steam may temporarily make you feel better, it's never the wisest course of action. And here's why. When you lose your temper, you lose control. The minute you blow your top, you blow your chance of staying in charge of the situation or yourself. Is that really where you want to be?
Why not choose to take the high ground and stay out of the fracas altogether? Not always easy, but it's the right way to go. When others lose their cool, you need to keep yours. By staying calm, you stay in control. When others lash out or verbally abuse you, you need to bite your tongue. By showing restraint, you do not make a bad situation even worse. I know, it's tough to do sometimes, especially when the words of others are unwarranted or totally out of line. But getting into a shouting match does nothing but add fuel to the fire. So don't.
You've got to be smarter than that.
"Prudent, cautious self-control is wisdom's root."
Interacting with unpleasant people always presents a challenge. How you handle or mishandle these telling moments says a lot about you. Whenever things start spiraling out of control, you need to maintain your composure. When emotions get hotter than hot, you need to stay as cool as a cucumber. When people push you right to the edge, don't fall over the cliff.
You need to be stronger than that.
When dealing with others, youve got to keep your emotions in check. Not some of your emotions, or most of them for that matter. You need to keep them all under control. Not some of the time, not most of the time, but all of the time. While it may take some practice, and a little patience, you can definitely do it.
When things take a turn for the worse, remember to stay strong, stay focused and stay in control. When you find yourself tempted to really let someone have it, please don't. When you feel like giving someone a piece of your mind, please don't. When you're ready to completely lose your cool and let it rip, please, please, please don't.
After all, you're way, way better than that.
The Bottom Line: Never allow anything or anyone any opportunity to steal your joy.
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